NBA Player’s Crack Addiction a Cautionary Tale

Kris Humphries, who is contracted to play basketball for the New Jersey Nets, is not what you’d qualify as a star player in The League.

Kim Kardashian Beach Bikini - She's Dating Miles Austin

(CRACK IS, indeed, WACK)

Averaging around eight points per game for one of the NBA’s most anonymous teams, Humphries might be the last guy in organized sports who you would think would need a high profile Hollywood publicist.

So why then did he recently hire Liza Anderson, who also reps Eva Longoria, to handle his public relations affairs?

Kim Kardashian and Reggie Bush

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Nets Jet: NBA Team Requests To Change Name

Stefan Bondy of the NEW YORK DAILY NEWS reports of the New Jersey Nets this week:

Mikhail Prokhorov New Jersey Nets Owner

(New team owner Mikhail) Prokhorov’s camp confirmed this morning that they’ve sent a request to the league to change the team’s name.

Changing a team’s nickname, uniform or city name is a long process requiring that the owner gives the NBA notice 25 months in advance.

The change, if it happens, would coincide with the team’s future move to Brooklyn.

Just for fun, here’s some possible team names that immediately came to mind when I thought about the new regime era in Nets basketball.

New name for relocated NBA team in Brooklyn:

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Leave your own suggestions in the comments. Like mine, keep them light and breezy!

Cleveland: Photos, Video Of LeBron Meeting Scene

Here’s a photo of the LeBron meeting scene in downtown Cleveland inside the IMG building. The shot came just as James was about to sit down with the owners of the New Jersey Nets, Mikhail Porkhorov and Jay-Z.

Jay-Z and Mikhail Prokhorov at LeBron meeting

Here’s a banner, via Brian Windhorst of the CLEVELAND PLAIN DEALER, that was strategically placed outside the IMG offices where the meetings are taking place:

The AKRON BEACON-JOURNAL also has video of the comings and goings of the various parties involved. Read more…

Blatche Now Headlining NBA Wizards Dog Show

Kyle Weidie of Truthaboutit.com achieved sports media alchemy today. Rarely do you get a post about a meaningless late season NBA game that does more than make you ponder if you’ve been running the tub too long.

Andray Blatche Falls Short On Triple Double Attempt

But Weidie, the Mary Seton of NBA Southeast Division bloggers, performed the miracle of making me care what happened at the Verizon Center last night.

Sunday evening, Andray Blatche of the Wizards was only one rebound away from a triple-double. With a little video editing magic, Weidie quickly chronicles Blatche’s delightfully desperate attempts during the last :30 to reach double figures in boards.

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I Think Mike Rowe Just Booked His Next Episode

Andrew Sharp of SBNation.com has this delightful promotion from the New Jersey Nets where you can be “Coach for the Day.

New Jersey Nets Coach For a Day

(Promo image: no Nets logo and generic, gray basketball nice touches)

WAIT A MINUTE, does Rod Thorn know about this?

Knicks Coach: No Interest In Charitable Gestures

Nice video find by Jose3030.FM:

Nate Robinson shoots at the wrong basket, scores for the Nets

(Vid after jump … shot)

That’s Nate Robinson of the New York Knicks today nailing a long shot - into the Nets’ basket. Surprisingly, Knicks Coach Mike D’Antoni wasn’t feeling nearly as charitable as Robinson.

Knicks-Nets game like watching two old people have sex

(Everyone has a fetish these days)

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New Jersey Nets’ Season: Gone In Six Seconds

This play is really all you need to know about the New Jersey Nets this season.

Brandon Jennings Dunks After Steal Against New Jersey Nets

But that Larry Frank, he can coach ‘em up! At least according to every NBA media member I’ve seen and heard from the last six weeks: “It’s not his fault, he has nothing to do with it!
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Buy Good Seats, Take A NJ Net Home For A Day

Yes, now you too can bring home Devon Harris here, or any of the New Jersey Nets, for your child’s birthday party or Bar Mitzvah. All one has to do is fork over $25,000 for four of the team’s best courtside seats for 10 games, and the Net of your choice can be yours.

Devon Harris at birthday party

Hey, it’s a tough economy, and the team is doing what it can to move tickets. But you heard it right: Pay the 25 grand, and that includes seats, parking, access to a private lounge at the Izod Center, free food and beverage, and a NJ Net at your office Christmas party. Wait … Yi Jianlian is my Secret Santa? Read more…

Chris Douglas-Roberts Is Candid About His Stalker

We’ve mentioned it plenty of times already here, but one of the crucial aspects of life for a pro athlete these days is the fact that they’re young and have unholy amounts of money. There’s probably no primer a target than they.

Chris Douglas-Roberts on the mic
(This man had a stalker. Don’t laugh. Why you gotta be laughing?)

So it’s pretty understandable that someone like Nets guard Chris Douglas-Roberts - he of the bengal kitten fame - would have some, ahem, devoted female fans. Fortunately, he’s got a Twitter feed, and as CDR explained a few days ago, he’s “approachable” on there. He’s even got stories, including one opus of 20+ tweets about a stalker he had last year. Was she crazy? Holy smokes yes, and CDR’s got details. Lots of details.

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Why NBA Owner Jay-Z Escaped Rush Judgement

Thanks to a rebuke of Rush Limbaugh by NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell and Colts Owner Jim Irsay this week, the talk radio host was dropped from a group bidding to buy the Rams today. Cited as basis for the rebuke was Limbaugh’s past “divisive” comments. Though the subject of those “divisive” comments went unclarified by Goodell. Though Limbaugh as a racist was the operative translation.

Rush Limbaugh Jay-Z More In Common Than You Think

(Rush vanquished by NFL Owners as Jay-Z welcomed by NBA Owners)

Now that Limbaugh’s personal bid has been reduced to tatters, onto other matters of import. From Jason Whitlock of FoxSports.com this week:

I’d say we’re less than 24 hours from Limbaugh playing the Jay-Z card. Brother Jay owns a piece of the New Jersey Nets and has a library of rap tunes spewing the same kind of black-degrading lyrics, phrases and stereotypes that have made Limbaugh rich enough to buy a chunk of the St. Louis Rams.

Then there’s rapper Nelly, who holds a minority interest in the NBA’s Charlotte Bobcats while happening upon a similar propensity for the debasement of women and black culture.

Would the NFL approve Jay-Z as a member of a team ownership group?

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So how is it that two men responsible for such prolific dissemination of detestables have been unanimously affirmed as owners of major league pro sports teams, but Limbaugh was cast out from his mere attempt to join an NFL ownership group?

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