Let’s Just Give A-Rod A Pass On This One, OK?

Hunting Alex Rodriguez for sport has been America’s favorite pastime for nearly a decade; and I’ll admit, he often presents a tempting target. His fling with Madonna alone reaffirmed my belief in God’s raucous sense of humor. And then of course this was like stumbling on a vein of pure comedy gold.

Alex Rodriguez

But Blogland is all in a self-righteous uproar today over A-Rod’s visit to a Maryland high school to talk to the students about steroid use. The word “hypocrite” is being tossed back and forth across the Internets like a beach ball at a Dodgers game. And this time it’s not fair. Rent a ladder and get down from your four-story horses, people.

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A-Rod ‘Clone’ Looks Like Uncle, But Can He Play?

So you’re 13 years old, you’re Alex Rodriguez’s nephew, you play for the same youth baseball team that A-Rod did, and you look pretty much exactly like him. Oh, and the NEW YORK DAILY NEWS just did a big story on you. Hey, no pressure kid. Meet Joe Dunand Jr., who seems to be in line for superstardom, or endless, expensive hours of therapy, in the near future (pick one).

Joe Dunand, Jr., Alex Rodriguez

As I mentioned in Speed Read on Thursday, I watched the son of former San Francisco Giant Terry Whitfield play in an early-round game of a district All-Star Little League tournament earlier this week. All that Eric Whitfield, 12, was able to accomplish in that game was four home runs in four at-bats — three of the drives completely clearing the creek that ran behind the outfield fence. But that’s a tricky age, where hormones and motor skills kick in at different paces; there’s no guarantee that, by age 16, Whitfield will be appreciably better than most of his teammates. And by all accounts, the biggest thing that Dunand, Jr. has going for him is that he looks like A-Rod. Read more…

Cougar Aniston Now Prowling For David Wright?

It’s pretty good to be David Wright these days. He’s got millions of dollars, Mets fans love him, and he never has to deal with being all over the back page of the POST and DAILY NEWS because of A-Rod and Derek Jeter.

Jennifer Aniston and David Wright

He has also apparently caught the eye of the newly-single Jennifer Aniston, who recently broke up with John Mayer. I mean, if a British tabloid called NOW says she’s interested, it must be true, right? According to Jen’s “friend” (the ‘Deep Throat’ of the gossip world), she has become intrigued with the idea of dating an athlete ever since seeing the “passionate” relationship between A-Rod and Madonna. Yuck.

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Rodman Unleashes a Halifax Cursing Explosion

The rubber chicken circuit can be a lucrative one with little formal education required.  Be famous and mildly entertaining, but mostly be famous.  Rich people will line up (apparently in any economy) with cashier’s checks to rub shoulders with you and you gain 10 lbs in three months.

Dennis Rodman and The Minis

(No, the whole team wasn’t invited to speak. Or do their juggling act.)

Of course, if you invite Dennis Rodman to your Canadian schmooze affair, you’d better bring Junior Ear Muffs for the children and Margaret Dumonts in the crowd ’cause he’s going to cuss up a proper swearstorm worthy of small craft warnings.  Sure, some people might walk out, but the rest of your doughy boys will giggle like schoolkids right into the office Monday.
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Is A-Rod Sending 10% Of His Salary To Kabbalah?

Now that Madonna and Guy Ritchie have decided to get divorced, she and also-newly-single Alex Rodriguez are finally free to go public with their creepy (alleged) love affair. It’s kinda like the Joe DiMaggio-Marilyn Monroe romance, just more cougar-y and a lot less clutch.

A-Rod Madonna

FOX NEWS reports that A-Rod has been secretly subletting an apartment in New York’s Time Warner Center for some time now, and that Madge has been a frequent guest to the building. Now A-Rod is supposedly diving head-first into the whole Kabbalah thing, and the religion stands to get about $27.5 million of Steinbrenner’s money, if you believe Jerry Hall.

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Brett Favre Already Has Plans For New York City

So as you’ve all been made aware of by now, the Green Bay Packers finally pulled the trigger on a deal that sent Hall of Fame-bound quarterback Brett Favre to the New York Jets. Finally, the national nightmare that was the Brett Favre Saga has come to an end, and life in America can resume. At least, you think it is.

Favre traded to Jets

You see, now that Brett’s been traded the odds are that the media attention he has received the last weeks is going to decrease. Instead of talking about him for 22 hours a day on ESPN, those at the worldwide leader only plan on talking about him for 18 hours today. This isn’t acceptable for Brett. He wants to be on our minds all day, everyday. The problem for Brett is now that he’s going to be playing in New York City, he has a lot of competition for the limelight. In Green Bay the only thing he had to compete with were a couple of cows and a few thousand people who feel that a wedge of cheese is meant to be worn on the head.

In New York, Brett’s bush league antics won’t fly, and that’s why he’s already begun scheming up new ways to keep every eye on him in the Big Apple. Find out what Brett’s planning to do after the jump.

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Madonna Was Once All Ga-Ga Over Joe DiMaggio

Seems that A-Rod isn’t the only Yankee Madonna has had her eyes on.

The NEW YORK POST’s PAGE SIX reveals what other well-known Bronx Bomber the Material Girl thought was the, um, bomb. Derek Jeter? Jason Giambi? Mariano Rivera?

Joe DiMaggio Madonna

Try Joe DiMaggio.

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ARod-Madonna Sex Tape Supposedly Up For Sale

You may be a bit tired hearing about this whole ARod-Madonna mess, but here’s something that might pique your interest once again - someone is selling a supposed sex tape of the singer & slugger.

A-Rod Madonna

MERKIN SPORTS tosses along news from the UK’s DAILY STAR that a man claims to have footage of the duo doing it, and is “demanding a fortune” from the highest possible bidder.

However, the guy’s plan to make a few extra bucks could backfire, and instead of facing a fortune, he could be facing jail time. Read more…

Blog Jam: Joe Theismann Expresses Love for TMZ

• TMZ may have just found their new spokesman in Joe Theismann.

Joe Theisman 80s hair & chair

• BASEBALL THINK FACTORY knew it was only a matter of time before some minor league team would schedule an “A-Rod & Madonna Night“.

• The L.A. DAILY BREEZE blows along news that the Clippers are actually out acquiring more talent, this time digging up Marcus Camby from the Nuggets.

• Can’t get a basketball scholarship? The LOS ANGELES TIMES learns that’s not a problem for Chace Stanback, since his mom just won $25,000 playing an online game.

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Rodriguez Brings Boras In As Marriage Counselor

When times get tough, you have to turn to someone you can trust. With the New York papers all over his marital discord, Alex Rodriguez has turned to an old familiar face to try and help smooth things over with wife Cynthia either towards a reconciliation (ha!) or, more likely, an attempt to keep the split a little more quiet. His former agent Scott Boras met with the unhappy couple in Toronto over the weekend.

A-Rod and Scott Boras

According to the NEW YORK DAILY NEWS, the superagent brokered the meeting (which allowed A-Rod to see his 3-year old daughter for the first time in weeks) and may even have met one-on-one with Cynthia.

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