Clip: Emmitt’s ESPN Reputation Remains Unsoiled

Today during ESPN2 First Take’s hourly break to mop and pressure wash Skip Bayless‘ interrogation room, we were blessed with an appearance by the network’s most beloved personality, Emmitt Smith.

From that delightful exchange with Reischea Canidate, we learned that Emmitt has been entrusted by Jerry Jones & Co. the exact role you would expect for such a prominent figure in Dallas pro football history.

Naturally, Emmitt has been officially charged with the public dissemination of unique, proprietary snow removal technology to be administered on metroplex roads in the event of a winter storm during Super Bowl week. Read more…

Audio: Emmitt Position On Vick Gets Blowed Out

Las Vegas sports radio titan Steve Cofield today sends along some audio of Emmitt Smith analyzing the future comeback of Michael Vick on ESPN-TV in 2007.

Michael Vick Emmitt Smith

“Like Parcells said I’m not sure he will play at the quarterback position and if I’m a general manager and I’m looking at Michael Vick right now, spending a year and a half, to two years or three years away from the game, I cannot have this guy as my quarterback.

“First of all he had a lot of issues trying to grasp the offense, go through the reads and find the right receivers in the first place. Let alone now spending three, three years or whatever many, however many time, how much time he’s away from the game trying to get that back when he come back it’s going to be very, very difficult.

“BUT, this is a guy who is very athletic. You can bring him in, have him play some kind of position on the football field whether it be punt return, kickoff return, third down wide receiver. Possibly even running back. Like to run the ball anyway so give him a chance at that.”

So despite last night’s stunning performance against the Redskins, Vick still hasn’t earned the Rite of Patches. Or Rice of Passage, for that matter. Read more…

Antonio Pierce Hasn’t Earned The Rites of Patches

Antonio Pierce dutifully informed us last night that Mike Shanahan has made Donovan McNabb an “escape goat“:

Antonio Pierce calls Donovan McNabb an escape goat. Emmitt Smith approves

(E.J.: Dap Tip)

This kid shows promise, but as Emmitt Smith will tell you, Pierce still hasn’t been given the rice of passage. Or earned the rites of patches. Or … oh screw it.
Read more…

Emmitt Apologizes For Florida Snub In HOF Speech

Earlier today I reported that Florida fans and media were perplexed, and in some cases upset, that Emmitt Smith failed to mention the University of Florida during his Hall of Fame speech in Canton on Saturday.

Emmit Smith apologizes for snubbing Florida in HOF speech

Sources subsequently indicated to me that Smith’s falling out with former Florida football coach Steve Spurrier contributed to the apparent snub. I was also told that that lingering feud resulted in Smith not attending the ceremony for his induction into the Univ. of Florida football’s Ring of Honor in 2006 at Florida Field.

In the aftermath of the public reaction to his Hall of Fame speech, Smith apologized today on his official Twitter.com account. Smith sent out three Tweets to that effect: Read more…

Gators Fans Irate Over Emmitt HOF Speech Snub

University of Florida fans and media are mystified over Emmitt Smith failing to make a single reference to his three years in Gainesville during his Hall of Fame speech yesterday in Canton - despite current Gators coach Urban Meyer being in attendance.

Emmitt Smith snubbed Florida in Hall of Fame speech

(Ask Steve Spurrier, he knows)

GAINESVILLE (FL) SUN reporter Pat Dooley, who covered Smith at Florida, wasn’t subtle in his reaction to Smith’s snub:

Apparently Emmitt went from Escambia directly to the Cowboys. Wow, I wasted my time covering some other guy wearing 22 from 87-89.”

That comment prompted UF alumna Erin Andrews to wonder to Dooley:

“@pat_dooley do u think it was intentional?? I can’t figure it out..”

Dooley’s reply to Andrews and others:

@ErinAndrews Hard to fathom. He’s run hot and cold with UF since he left. But when he retired he mentioned everyone down to SID secretary … Emmitt and UF have had a rocky relationship but I thought it was patched up by Urban. Maybe he just forgot. Or maybe not. … it’s been a shaky deal ever since he left and spurrier didn’t beg him to play senior year.

Florida fan reaction was far less subtle, bordering on outrage.

Ethan Skolnick of the SOUTH FLORIDA SUN-SENTINEL presented another theory:

The snub made news on Twitter, with UF students and alumni expressing their disappointment and confusion. Smith, after all, is in the Gators’ Ring of Honor, though he didn’t show up for that ceremony. And current Gators coach Urban Meyer was in attendance Saturday night.

I don’t have many inside connections at Florida, but a few media friends of mine do. And their strong suspicion, based on some recent circumstances, is that the snub was due to Smith’s strained relationship with Florida AD Jeremy Foley.

Smith missed that Ring of Honor ceremony because of what he claimed at the time was a practice commitment to Dancing with the Stars.

But in talking to multiple sources today, including Florida athletic dept. officials, I have no doubt that Smith purposefully snubbed Florida and that Ring of Honor ceremony for one reason. Read more…

Behold: Dubya-Emmitt Summit At Cowboys Game

I’m still trying to find a screen grab, but you’ve no doubt seen it live; NBC’s shot of George W. Bush and Emmitt Smith seated next to each other and chatting it up in the owner’s box just before the start of tonight’s playoff game in Dallas.

Bush, Emmitt Twitter

The Twitter Machine is racing at this hour as speculation runs rampant as to what these legendary wordsmiths might have been discussing. The answer is shrouded in mystery. But one thing is certain: while we’re currently only at halftime of the NFC Wildcard struggle, we already have a loser: The English language.  Read more…

Emmitt Smith’s Employment at ESPN ‘Blowed Out’

It’s been such a joy to watch Emmitt Smith on ESPN’s NFL programs. Of course, it really isn’t for his brilliant analysis, but the brilliantly baffling way he can mangle the English language. A latter-day Yogi Berra, if you will.

Emmitt Smith Dancing With The Stars

(And he’s quite a dancer, too)

Sadly, we won’t have Emmitt to wow us on the Worldwide Leader anymore, as both parties have apparently parted ways.

Read more…

Speed Read: Panthers Smash & Dash Way To Win

After last week’s less-than-epic Houston vs. Jacksonville Monday Night Football tilt, just about anything would have been an improvement (short of a “dream pairing” of Dennis Miller and Tony Kornheiser). But last night was a great way to cap any week: two 9-3 teams in Tampa Bay and Carolina battling for first place in the NFC South.

Carolina Panthers vs Tampa Bay Buccaneers

And honestly, if you would have told me that Jeff Garcia was going to throw for more than 300 yards, I would have given the Bucs a pretty fair shot at winning the game. But the trump card turned out to be the Panthers’ RB duo of Smash & Dash, i.e. DeAngelo Williams and Jonathan Stewart, who helped the Panthers combine for almost 300 yards of rushing and a crucial 38-23 victory.

The person on Tampa Bay I feel sorry for is Antonio Bryant, who had a huge game in defeat, as in 200 yards of receiving. (How many fantasy football owners are cursing themselves this morning because they left him on their bench this week.) This included one of the most amazing touchdown catches you’ll see all year:

Speaking of amazing…USA TODAY has a breakdown of the final ballots for the college football Coaches’ Poll, and some of the votes are pretty unbelievable. Like that Utah’s Kyle Whittingham voted his team ahead of USC (I’d like to see that game on the field), or that Ty Willingham voted Missouri 11th despite getting killed in the Big XII Championship Game. But my favorite? Texas Tech’s Mike Leach voting the Red Raiders second - ahead of Florida and Texas. At least he had the decency to place the team that beat him by 44 ahead of Tech.

Some more sports insanity to brighten up your day:

What’s the toughest division in the NFL?

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Speed Read: Is This Good Enough, Boston Fans?

Cheer up, Boston sports fans. Sure, the Red Sox might have brought you to the brink of exaltation only to send you crashing to the ground like to some junkie with a packet of methadone, but at least the Patriots have kept your hopes adrift for another week with their 41-7 win over the Denver Broncos on Monday night.

Randy Moss

Sure, this might have been a performance against the same team that lost to the putrid Kansas City Chiefs, but it’s something to be proud of, right?  Rodney Harrison might have blown his knee out, a crippling blow to a depleted Patriots secondary, but come on…: did you see Matt Cassel? He’s the second coming of Tom Brady, the wa y he hooked up with Randy Moss. Right? Right???

New 49ers Coach Mike Singletary

New England fans, I’ll let you slepp on your false sense of security for now. At least ou aren’t 49ers fans, who have seen their team go from playoff contenders to also-rans in the course of a few short weeks. Which means that head coach Mike Nolan is gone, replaced by Mike Singletary, who will at least kill his team with his eyes. The eyes, the eyes, oh Lord the eyes!

Here’s what else happened last night while you were out raging against the machine with Tim McGraw:

Gina Carano

How many wins will the Patriots end up with?

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Blog-O-Rama: Tee Up Some Fun With Golf Lingerie

• GOLF BABES tees up the latest fashions we hope to soon see Natalie Gulbis & Anna Rawson sporting - golf lingerie.

golf lingerie

• SI’s Arash Markazi understands Emmitt Smith doesn’t like Ocho Cinco’s plans to smooch the Cowboys’ star: “He can kiss the star anytime he wants, but not after scoring a touchdown. I have a problem with that.”

• Not to be outdone by Jamie Apody, YOU BEEN BLINDED pours out a clip of Manny Ramirez getting a female Fox reporter all wet.

• PLAYING THE FIELD needs some help with their pigskin picks. So they go to someone who knows all about skin - a guy who works at Victoria’s Secret. In the meantime, we’ll go ask the models.

Read more…