Speed Read: Did Mayweather Beat Female Boxer?

When the cops come to your house, it doesn’t look good when they find you physically holding down a woman who is screaming and crying while trying to break free. Especially if she then proceeds to go to the kitchen and starts “coughing and spitting up blood.” I don’t know if Roger Mayweather tried the “hey guys…this isn’t what it looks like” move, hoping that the cops would think it’s a wacky mix-up like you would see on “Three’s Company.” But if he did - it didn’t work.

Melissa St Vil and Roger Mayweather

Mayweather - the uncle and trainer of Floyd Mayweather Jr. - was taken into custody on Sunday and charged with coercion with force and strangulation after allegedly attacking boxer and aspiring model Melissa St. Vil, who had moved to Las Vegas to train with Mayweather. But she had split with Mayweather as a trainer recently, although she was staying at an apartment owned by him and shared with Corneluis Lock, a contender who had lost in the main event of an ESPN Friday Night Fight on July 24.

Melissa St Vil

According to the police report, St. Vil claimed that Mayweather was unhappy with her continuing to live in the house and had begun harrassing her, which Lock corroborated by saying that Mayweather had been “bothering her at the residence, as well as following her to her new gym.” (Side note: I’m guessing that if you roll over on your trainer to the cops, you’ll be doing some extra roadwork next training session.)

It all apparently came to a head on Sunday afternoon. While Lock was at church (which St. Vil says is no coincidence), Mayweather allegedly tried to forcibly remove St. Vil from the house. When she refused and tried to go to her room, police say Mayweather started punching her in the ribs and then choked her until she nearly lost consciousness. St. Vil said was able to free herself by grabbing a lamp and delivering a lead right straight to Mayweather’s head, which is right about when the cops showed up.

So where does this leave everyone? For Roger Mayweather, it leaves him in a lot of trouble. It also casts doubts on Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s scheduled comeback fight against Juan Manuel Marquez in September - with what appears to be both criminal and civil cases pending, can Roger Mayweather actually prepare his nephew for the fight? Even for the three-ring circus that is the Mayweather family, this is pretty ridiculous.

Also ridiculous: that Cristiano Ronaldo can blow off women who look like his former girlfriend Nereida Gallardo and who enjoy taking topless pictures of themselves making out with other hot women in nightclub bathrooms. And just blow off, but publicly humiliate her with tabloid photographers capturing everything.

Cristiano Ronaldo

According to the DAILY MAIL, Gallardo happened to spot Ronaldo going into a nightclub in Majorca while he was on vacation. She tried to get his attention, but she was “tackled by a security guard as she made a beeline for the 24-year-old sportsman and promptly whisked away” while Ronaldo treated her like a ghost.

Then again, she did tell reporters after they split that he was “a vain mummy’s boy, who waxed his chest,” so anyone who has ever run into a crazy ex while out can relate to Ronaldo’s dilemma. Then again, most of us don’t have teams of beefy security guards to help us out.

Finally, in some positive news: Maria Sharapova is back in action, which is a good thing. She easily beat Jarmila Groth in the early rounds of the L.A. Women’s Tennis Championships, her first tournament back since surgery on her right shoulder ten months ago. But somehow, that wasn’t the big news story of the day. Because there was a catfight brewing, and it was about it go off!

Maria Sharapova

OK, not really. But defending champion Dinara Safina spent most of the day defending her world No. 1 ranking after Serena Williams had earlier questioned how Safina - who has never won a major - could be ranked No. 1 by saying sarcastically “Dinara did a great job to get to No. 1, she won Rome and Madrid.” However, anyone expecting a battle royal to break out had to be disappointed, as Safina “just answered questions pleasantly” when asked about the comments. Apparently someone doesn’t understand how PR works.

  • Suspected first-round bust Darrius Heyward-Bey is at Oakland Raiders training camp, and he’s acting…well, exactly like a first-round bust would, dropping passes and basically reaffirming the notion that Al Davis has gone from eccentric to “pouring castor oil into a bowl of Froot Loops and then dumping them on his head while singing ‘Strangers in the Night’” crazy.
  • Darrius heyward bey

  • Remember how we mentioned yesterday that Andy Reid’s notorious training camps had already claimed two Eagles players with “minor” injuries? Turns out one of them wasn’t so minor, as starting LB and leading tackler from 2008 Stewart Bradley is out for the season after tearing his right ACL. Meanwhile, Reid has invented some controversy with the media for - gasp! - trying to find out about the injury.
  • PUCK DADDY compares the Phoenix Coyotes’ ownership trial unfavorably to an episode of “Night Court.” I can see his point, since this trial does not involve Markie Post’s breasts. But then again, Mel Torme is nowhere to be seen.
  • Three days after his grandmother passed away, Denny Hamlin picked up his first NASCAR Sprint Cup Series win in 50 races at the rain-delayed Pennsylvania 500 at Pocono.
  • Clete Thomas said he didn’t know what to do when he hit a walk-off homer to lift the Tigers over the Orioles 6-5 on Monday night. Here’s a hint: running the bases so we could go home would be nice.
  • The Eagles and first-round draft pick Jeremy Maclin finally seal the deal, inking a five-year contract worth $15.5 million. If I were him, I’d stay away from Andy Reid’s Bataan Death March and hold out a few more weeks.
  • Here’s one way to make sure you come out ahead in poker: a dealer at the Bellagio in Las Vegas was apparently arrested for allegedly taking two $1,000 chips from a split pot.
  • As Scott Wolf of the LOS ANGELES DAILY NEWS reports, nothing says excitement like a small handful of reporters disinterestedly checking their email while new Pac-10 commissioner Larry Scott addresses them during Media Day. Why do they have these things again, other than to get free lunches?
  • Indoor soccer + short, fat, balding guy + kid flying in at 100 mph = comedy gold.

  • If you believe that Urban Meyer’s new six-year, $24 million deal with Florida means he’s never, ever, ever leaving the Gators, think again: the buyout penalty if he leaves for another school is only $500,000. Some Notre Dame alums carry that around as tip money for their caddies.

In five years Urban Meyer will be coaching:

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Speed Read: T.O. Lobbies, Tweets For Mike Vick

When SbB held its first 30-day moratorium poll this past week, I was somewhat disappointed that there could be only one winner. And while the actual choice (who shall not be named) was fine enough, it meant that we were still going to have to talk about what Terrell Owens is doing.

TO and Michael Vick

And that, today, is apparently suggesting that Roger Goodell go spend some time in prison so that he knows what Michael Vick has been through. This in response to the idea floating around that Goodell plans to suspend Vick for four games as a condition for returning to the league. Ray Ratto thinks T.O. might have some ulterior motives, but that he appears to be genuine in his support for Vick. Now, about the suspension…well, I can’t put it nearly as eloquently as T.O. can (via FANHOUSE):

“I don’t think it’s really fair for him to be suspended four more games. That’s almost like kicking a dead horse in the ground.”

Well said, sir.

He’s also using Twitter to try and round up support for Vick, hoping that a groundswell of public sentiment will sway Goodell. I mean, it’s just like that whole thing over in Iran.

Oddly, T.O. has a bit of a point. Vick’s livelihood was taken away while he was in prison, so why would Goodell feel the need to tack on a token suspension that is the same length as one for a first violation of the league’s drug policy? I mean, if he really considered the prison time as separate from the league’s punishment, then you would think the suspension would be harsher, like a year or something. Otherwise, isn’t being out of the league for two years and going bankrupt serving the same purpose? I don’t think Goodell has to give him four games off to prove that the NFL doesn’t approve of dogfighters. I think that’s pretty well understood, considering you get in trouble for wearing your socks wrong in that league.

Michael Vick chased by dog

Don’t be fooled by that 5-0 win by Mexico over the U.S. in the CONCACAF Gold Cup final yesterday at Giants Stadium. The Americans have been playing this entire tournament with a second-tier squad made up mostly of players with little international experience. The Mexicans, meanwhile, put a much better team out on the field, as was shown by their dominance throughout the tournament. And, while it was sad to see the U.S. team fall apart, the way Mexico dismantled our guys in the second half was quite a thing to watch (the game was scoreless at halftime). Get ready for goooooooooooools-a-plenty:

The U.S. was somewhat fortunate to advance this far, struggling to a tie with powerhouse Haiti and needing extra time to beat Panama. So a loss was to be expected, though the magnitude was larger than anyone thought. It’s the worst loss for the U.S. since 1985. Perhaps it was for the best that it was only on in English on the tiny Fox Soccer Channel.

If anything, this was a moral boost for the Mexicans going into the huge showdown on August 12th between the two countries in World Cup qualifying in Mexico City. None of the players the U.S. used yesterday are likely to play in that game, while a couple of Mexico’s players will probably see action. But I can’t imagine that this game is really going to have much impact on the qualifier. The NEW YORK DAILY NEWS’ Filip Bondy seems to think that the credibility the U.S. earned in games against Spain and Brazil is diminished by this result, but anyone who follows the sport closely (ie. everyone in the world besides Americans) knows that the U.S. lineup was a shell of the team that made waves in South Africa.

The NEW YORK TIMES seems to have grasped this, and notes that all of the goodwill Mexico earned yesterday could be lost if they can’t beat the Americans in August. The U.S. is 0-22-1 all-time in Mexico, but a win by the Americans would be devastating to the hosts, who are fourth in the qualifying group (only the top three automatically make the World Cup). The U.S. is currently in second place behind Costa Rica.

Mexico gold cup

• The Ravens were stunned by Derrick Mason’s retirement, so they went out and signed Drew Bennett to replace him. Bennett lasted all of two days before deciding to retire yesterday. You just aren’t meant to have wide receivers, Baltimore.

• Wait, who’s in first place in the NL Central? Oh yeah, it’s the team the Phillies are going to sweep in the first round in October.

Keith Olbermann says that Sparky Anderson and Pete Rose spoke for the first time in 20 years on Saturday in Cooperstown. Rose shows up every year to sign memorabilia on HOF weekend.

Sparky Anderson Pete Rose

• Ladbrokes is offering 100-1 odds that one of Roger Federer’s twin daughters will win Wimbledon by the age of 25. They’re five days old.

Dinara Safina: Really good at winning tournaments nobody cares about.

Lou Holtz took a Notre Dame alumni team over to Japan, where he coached them to a 19-3 win over the Japanese national team. No word on whether or not “Dr. Lou” made an appearance on Japanese television.

• MENTAL FLOSS challenges you to pick which hat 14 Hall of Famers wore to their induction.

Dwyane Wade is tweeting to Lamar Odom, trying to coax him down to Miami. What he doesn’t seem to realize is that a bag of Jolly Ranchers will do the trick.

candy

• A cricket player was struck by lightning in Brooklyn yesterday afternoon during a match. He’s listed in serious condition. The ghost of Gil Hodges has been brought in for questioning.

• Massive rivals AC Milan and Inter Milan met yesterday in, of all places, Gillette Stadium in Foxboro. In other news, the Giants and Jets will play each other this year in Reykjavik.

• French president Nicolas Sarkozy can’t stand the heat. Literally. He collapsed while jogging yesterday in Paris, but he’s going to be just fine. Which means we can run this picture of his wife without any guilt:

Carla Bruni Sarkozy

 

What do you think of a rumored 4-game suspension for Michael Vick?

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Cuter Competitors Get Wimbledon’s Centre Court

Earlier this week, we reported how tennis commentator Michael Stich ruffled a few feathers when he, um, commented about how women players at Wimbledon are there to “sell sex” (well, not literally). Although it sounds sexist & unfair, it seems there’s a kernel of truth to his statement. And maybe not just a kernel, but a whole bag of Orville Redenbacher’s Gourmet Popping Corn.

Victoria Azarenka Sorana Cirstea

(Victoria Azarenka vs. Sorana Cirstea - low Wimbledon rankings, but high Wimbledon ratings)

Turns out that when selecting which match-ups will play at Wimbledon’s Centre Court, it’s not always the higher-seeded ladies that get to play in the main arena. Instead, it’s the lower-seeded cuties that are often the ones courted to take Centre stage.

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Speed Read: Lakers Crush Magic, TV Execs Hearts

That sound you heard in New York last night were league officials and ABC executives quietly weeping into their gin and tonics while watching Game 1 of the NBA Finals. Because what they were watching was the one thing they didn’t need: a Los Angeles Lakers blowout. For the casual fan, the 100-75 drubbing of the Orlando Magic just confirmed what they already knew, that this series is a letdown after the hype of Kobe Bryant vs. LeBron James, and the Lakers are going to crush the upstart Magic.

Kobe Bryant

Sure, it was close…for a little over a quarter. The Magic did have a five-point lead early in the second quarter, and then the roof collapsed. This is what happens when a team that relies on three-point shooting has a sub-par shooting game (going 8-for-23 from beyond the arc). Without having to fear the Magic from the outside, the Lakers could double and triple-team Dwight Howard, a form of kryptonite that even Superman couldn’t overcome, going 1-for-6 and scoring just 12 points.

Dwight Howard

So while Howard struggled, Kobe was superb, scoring 40 points while coming close to a triple-double. He had 12 points in the second quarter as the Lakers established their dominance, and was able to create opportunities for Pau Gasol and the rest of his supporting cast. And with Phil Jackson being 43-0 in series where his team wins the opening game, Magic coach Stan Van Gundy has to be sweating through his Men’s Wearhouse coat.

But if the Magic need any inspiration, they only need to look to the Stanley Cup (assuming they get Versus in central Florida). Facing a 2-0 deficit against the defending champion Detroit Red Wings, the Pittsburgh Penguins have rallied to tie the series after a 4-2 win in Game 4. Which is especially impressive since they managed to turn an early lead into a 2-1 hole in the second period, which could have easily crippled a lesser team.

Pittsburgh Penguins

And in what can only be seen as a good sign for the Penguins, Sidney Crosby had his first goal of the series, while Evgeni Malkin added a goal and an assist. So now we basically have a best-of-three series starting tomorrow night in Detroit. While the Red Wings are still probably going to win the series, at least the Penguins have made it interesting.

Randy Johnson

Finally, let’s tip our hat to Randy Johnson, who became the first pitcher since Tom Seaver in 1985 to get his 300th victory in his first attempt thanks to the Giants’ 5-1 victory over the Nationals. Thank you for sparing us of the daily update on the ESPN crawl and live game updates ruining our PBA Tour broadcasts on Wednesday nights on ESPN2. The Giants are planning a pregame celebration before their next home game to congratulate Johnson on his 300 career wins - all four of them with San Francisco.

  • The French Open women’s singles final is set, with Dinara Safina and Svetlana Kuznetsova taking each other on in an all-Russian final. In terms of eye candy, this isn’t exactly the Maria Sharapova vs. Ana Ivanovic Australian Open final from last year.
  • Dinara Safina and Svetlana Kuznetsova

  • Calvin Borel isn’t just confident that he’s going to win the Belmont Stakes on Mine That Bird to win the jockey Triple Crown, he’s guaranteeing it. (At least that’s what we think he said with molasses-thick drawl.) If he does pull this off, does this mean he gets put out to stud?
  • LeBron, here’s your slap on the wrist: the NBA fines King James $25,000 for bailing on the post-game press conference after the Cavs’ Game 6 loss to the Magic in the Eastern Conference finals. Plus, you made David Stern cry. How does that feel, LeBron.
  • You want Dontrelle Willis to succeed in his comeback with the Tigers, but then something like this happens: in 2-1/3 innings against the Red Sox yesterday, Willis gave up five runs without allowing a hit, walking five and hitting a batter.
  • Just when you thought that it couldn’t get worse for the New York Mets than getting swept by the Pirates, it also turns out that Jose Reyes has a torn hamstring.
  • John Raines, a substitute teacher and athletic trainer at Sussex Central High in Delaware, has been arrested and charged with “inappropriately touching a student-athlete while treating her injury and threatening to prevent her from playing her sport when she tried to stop his advances.” Which is bad enough, but even worse when considering he’s the second faculty member arrested on sex crimes in the past two days and the third within a year.
  • Spencer Cruise, an all-state high school football player in Iowa, allegedly bodyslammed a cop who was busting up a party and then Tasered him with his own weapon.
  • Buffalo Bills owner Ralph Wilson has selected ESPN’s Chris Berman to introduce him before his induction into the Pro Football Hall of Fame, and PRO FOOTBALL TALK wonders if that’s such a great idea. (Seriously, was Jim Kelly busy?)
  • Former Tulsa football player Neal Sweeney apparently got into a business dispute with the wrong person, as it ended up with him being shot dead at his fuel sales company. Police have arrested the person they believe is the triggerman, and hope this leads to further breaks in the case.
  • Maurice Neal, a linebacker for the Utah Utes, has been arrested in connection with a bar fight where he took out two men. Shouldn’t Utah be the last place that a bar fight should be happening?

Who is going to be the next 300 game winner in baseball?

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Michael Irvin Nearly RIP In Road Rage Encounter

Michael Irvin almost meets his maker when he’s met by a mad motorist with a Magnum.

Michael Irvin girl with guns

• A Kentucky ‘Cat goes Wild in a 54-point outburst versus the Vols.

Isiah Thomas’ brother can’t pass a church without passing urine onto it.

Michael Jordan wants to give you his tender, juicy meat.

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SbB Caption Contest: Keep Your Eye On The Ball

Hey, readers! It’s time for another sublime SbB Clever Caption Contest!

Today we serve up a snapshot of Russian tennis player Dinara Safina, who shows us the proper way of keeping your eye on the ball:

Dinara Safina

Have a quip that better encapsulates this scene? Submit you suggestions into the comments section linked below. Winner will be announced in the end-of-the-day recap.

Good luck & good writing! But try not to get too high-strung about it.

Ivanovic Wins French Open Over Fellow Hottie

That rumbling sound you hear is the avalanche of sportscasters around the world quipping in unison,”Ana Ivanovic has finally shed the comparisons to Anna Kournikova!” That’s so clever! Because they’re both pretty communists!

Ana Ivanovic Kisses Trophy

Okay, they’re not really communists. Anyway, Ivanovic trounced fellow hottie Dinara Safina to win the French Open earlier today. Viva Serbia! Or something.

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