So that Twitter alert by Chad Ochocinco yesterday, where he told everyone that he’s getting facial tattoos, and included these photos? It was a fake. The playful Bengal was having some fun at our expense! What a rapscallion! That certainly was humorous! (Yawns, resumes watching “Harper’s Island”).
The artist formerly known as Chad Johnson sent out a Tweet today informing everyone of the fake. Good thing, because that one on the right looks like a penis. Oh wait, it’s Florida. Read more…
• The Lakers had a tougher time in Game 2, needing overtime to beat the Magic - and no goaltending calls on Courtney Lee’s final regulation shot.
• Could Pacman Jones be wocka-wocka-walking back to the Cowboys?
Johnson Ochocinco embraces his newfound “Mexican” heritage by already planning his 1st TD celebration - hanging a pinata on the goalpost & whacking it with an end zone pylon.
• Hope you Memphis Redbirds fans have fun tonight during Stubby Clapp Appreciation Night!
• Recently retired Rodney Harrison rants about how the NFL is turning soft & pansy-esque.
Tags: Andrew Thomas Gallo
, Andre Rison
, Auburn Tigers
, Cael Sanderson
, Chad Johnson
, Chad Ochocinco
, Cincinnati Bengals
, Courtney Lee
, Dallas Cowboys
, Iowa State Cyclones
, Los Angeles Lakers
, Melissa Anne Teixeira
, Memphis Redbirds
, Nick Adenhart
, Orlando Magic
, Pacman Jones
, Pau Gasol
, Rodney Harrison
, Stubby Clapp
, Tony Franklin
No one believed Chad Johnson when he said he would legally change his name to reflect his nickname, “Ocho Cinco.” But that’s just what he did last summer, in an attempt to wear the name on his uniform. The NFL balked, saying he’d have to pay for the already-made Johnson jerseys. Well, no more is he shackled to his human name.
The NFL finally agreed this week to let him put his new name on the back of his uniform. And therein lies hilarity. He’s only allowed to wear his legal name, and his legal name isn’t “Ocho Cinco.” It seems when Chad filled out the paperwork to change his name, he didn’t get it quite how he wanted.
We all thought Chad Johnson was crazy when he changed his name to Ocho Cinco. We thought Greg White was weird and a little obsessed with “Teen Wolf” when he changed his name to Stylez G. White. But those are large, strong men, who we would never dare make fun of to their face. But what if you met a punter named World of Warcraft?
That’s Chris Kluwe of the Vikings, who’s either the biggest video game nerd in the world, or the shrewdest businessman in the world. Can you imagine how many people would buy an officially licensed jersey with “Warcraft” on the back? On the other hand, there might be a few extra “running into the kicker” penalties next year. Chris Kluwe is stupid like a fox, after the jump.
In less than a week, the citizens of the United States of America will be hitting the voting booths to select a candidate who will lead this great nation for the next four years. (Unless you already voted early, or said candidate gets impeached at some point.) And in the electoral battleground of Ohio, a couple of the Buckeye State’s biggest sports stars are doing some last-minute stumping.
While Brady Quinn has already courageously did his part for John McCain, LeBron James is rallying to back Barack Obama. CLEVELAND.COM reports that the Cavs star will be hosting a special event at the Quicken Loans Arena tonight to show his support for the Democratic presidential hopeful. Joining LeBron at the Q will be his buddy (and future boss?) Jay-Z. King James hopes tonight’s performance goes better than last night’s.
On the other side of the state, Chad Javon Ocho Cinco Johnson Esq. reportedly had his own special tribute planned for the Illinois senator.
You know, you’d think that Chad Johnson would’ve asked a few questions to make sure everything was going to work out before he went and changed his freaking last name. But that would probably be asking to much, right?
It appears as if he will not get to wear his new last name, “Ocho Cinco” (actually, “D’oh-cho Cinco” would be more appropriate now) on his uniform at all this season because of a contractual situation with Reebok. It would cost him what is described as “a lot of money” to make the switch, as Reebok has an inventory of jerseys with his old name on them. Which or course now begs the question: what if he’s not with the Bengals next year, and what if he has to wear like 84 or something?
• GIBBS12 needles us with their choices of the worst sports tattoos.
(Who says tattoo artists need a spellchecker - right, Clemson?)
• Boo! WITH LEATHER follows some frightened Tampa Bay Buccaneers cheerleaders through a haunted house.
• Chick Ludwig of the DAYTON DAILY NEWS learns that Chad Javon Ocho Cinco Johnson Esq. actually fulfilled his promised and kissed the star in Dallas - the star being his head coach Marvin Lewis.
• LAKERS NATION dribbles along word from the Big Cactus himself that it’s all cool between Shaq & Kobe.
After the Bengals fell to 0-4 a couple of weeks ago, Chad
Johnson Ocho Cinco Cero Cinco came up with a theory as to why the team was losing. “We have cleaned house and nobody is getting in trouble anymore — no DUIs, no arrests. Now we’re getting … whupped. I don’t know. Maybe I should go out, have a drink, get in trouble.” Chad didn’t live up to his word, and as a result, the Bengals went and got beat by the Cowboys last Sunday.
Now it appears that somebody has heard Chad’s call to arms. He didn’t get drunk and go driving around Cincinnati, get into any bar fights, or pick up any underage girls, but reserve linebacker Darryl Blackstock did get himself suspended.
• Tired of waiting for a Super Bowl ring, Tony Romo might be teaming up with Jessica Simpson in acquiring some engagement jewelry.
• The Red Sox seem to have a knack for smacking the Angels in October.
• A Cubs fan gets arrested for throwing a ball at Manny Ramirez. And being a Cubs fan, of course he completely misses.
• The New Jersey Nets are offering a unique “pick up now, pay later” plan for season tickets. The catch - you still have to watch the Nets.
• A daily double from Ocho Cinco: The Bengals WR plans to kiss the Cowboys’ star and wet his lips with too much booze.
Tags: Alex Rodriguez
, Allison Stokke
, Anaheim Angels
, Anna Rawson
, Boston Red Sox
, Chad Johnson
, Chicago Cubs
, Cincinnati Bengals
, Claudia Porras
, Dallas Cowboys
, Florida Marlins
, Jessica Simpson
, Larry Brown
, Manny Ramirez
, Natalie Gulbis
, New Jersey Nets
, Suzy Kolber
, Tom Brady
, Tony Romo
, Willis Mcgahee
Never a dull moment when Chad Javon Ocho Cinco Johnson, Esq., is in earshot of a microphone or reporter’s notepad. We’ve already been treated today to the receiver’s promise that he’ll kiss the Cowboys star
if when he’s scores a TD in Big D this weekend.
Now Chad makes it twice as nice for our Thursday reporting. He seems to know why the Cincinnati Bengals have been slipping in the win column. It’s not the offensive offense or the doubtful defense, it’s just that the Bengals aren’t breaking the law like they used to.