Here’s two photos of Andre Smith at Cincinnati Bengals training camp yesterday:
• Is there really any reason to watch the Fox College Sports broadcast of Kansas vs. Northern Colorado? Yes - and that reason is Samantha Steele.
• It’s bad enough Brett Favre can never decide when to end his career, but does he have to try to end other players’ careers with cheap blocks?
• Pacman Jones could be taking off for the Great White North. Winnipeg strip clubs already prepared to “Make it snow!” (It’s too cold for rain.)
• Why did Rich Rodriguez tear up during his recent press conference? Maybe because he’s being sued in a real estate deal gone wrong.
• Golf in England deserves a two-stroke penalty for banning beautiful caddy babes from the courses.
After weeks of haggling & holding out, rookie right tackle Andre Smith finally signed with the Cincinnati Bengals on Sunday. Before the holdout, Cincy had their sights on slotting Smith as a starter this season. Now with a 4-year-deal ironed out, it seemed that the final piece of the puzzle had finally fallen in place for the Bengals.
So, of course 48 hours later, Andre goes out and breaks his foot.
• Grant Hill reveals that Christian Laettner is a big jerk. In other news, sky is blue, water is wet, Duke is overrated.
• A former U of Minnesota running back can’t leave the state to attend an NFL tryout - just because he’s an “untreated sex offender“.
• There’s nothing like a buzzer-beater to punch your ticket to the Big Dance.
• The Yankees hope to have the healthiest ballpark in the league.
• Delaware seems determined to take a gamble on sports betting.
Some fun images from EDSBS this week, via LSU Freek. First, Lane Kiffin … unleashed!
And shirts & skins nightmare fuel … former Alabama lineman Andre Smith:
Former Alabama offensive lineman Andre Smith is a surefire Top 10 NFL pick. He’s big as a house (he checks in on the scale between 270 and 330 pounds), he’s fast and he has a heck of a mean streak. Unfortunately, he also has no discipline, which is why he’s finding himself back under the microscope of public attention at the NFL Scouting Combine, primarily because he’s gone missing from the event all together.
(How, exactly, can you lose sight of this mammal?)
According to SI.com’s Tony Pauline, Smith — a 270-pound man mountain — vanished into thin air this morning in Indianapolis at the NFL Combine. When NFL officials scrambled to find him, they were eventually informed that he had flown back to Atlanta to resume workouts, according to his agent, Alvins Keels. Fat chance that’s the real reason, though Smith is fat enough while out of shape to significantly improve those odds via his body mass alone.
Every year we celebrate the bloody massacre of Texans at the hand of the Mexican army, and this was before soccer was popular. The Alamo Bowl, then, is the college game in which a team is crowned new saviors of the Republic of Texas, and for one year they are enshrined within the walls of the Alamo to protect from any uprising. And you goofy playoff advocates thought the bowl system was irrelevant.
Missouri will be this year’s defenders, since they pushed Northwestern past the limit in a 30-23 overtime victory. Chase Daniel will be Davy Crockett, the heroic senior leader of the team, who kept his Tigers in the game despite the NWern Wildcats regaining the lead three times. Daniel’s TD pass to Jeremy Maclin in overtime was the difference. (Maclin can be the William B. Travis in this grand metaphor). The highly accurate kicker, Jeff Wolfert, blew a 44-yard field goal at the end of regulation that would have won the game, but his team came out victorious nonetheless, so he can be Sam Houston. I’d assign some roles to the Northwestern football team but I’m running out of Battle of the Alamo parallels.
Andre Smith is a big deal, for he is the nation’s best lineman and will probably be a top three pick in the NFL Draft. He allowed one sack all season, and is probably the MVP of the Alabama offense. He is not a quarterback like Tebow, Bradford, Colt, Harrell or Your Favorite Quarterback. But he will not play in the Sugar Bowl due to a suspension, and ESPN.COM’s Chris Low has some info that says he talked to an agent, which is a big NCAA no-no. Obviously, this is a large story, since it’s on ESPN and making the rounds on the wires … but just imagine how much bigger of a deal the media, fans, bloggers, and bettors would make of it had John Parker Wilson been the one suspended. But it’s just a stupid lineman. There are, like, seven of those or something on the field at once. No big deal. The real question is: Will the beef stew Terrelle Pryor ate today affect his Fiesta Bowl passer rating?
This might be the computer that will determine the price of Giants tickets next year. About 2,000 seats will fall under this automated pricing formula, which factors in things like weather, popularity of opposing team, and whether or not Barry Zito will be pitching. This may potentially revolutionize the way sporting event ticket prices are
gouged set, and finally gives the world a chance to dust off the ol’ quadratic formula to see how much the weekend will cost you.
The sum of the square roots of the following stories equals:
- AUTOPIA takes a look at souped-up snowmobiles from around the world. I see nothing wrong with turning a Chevy Nova into what looks like a tank.
- The Red Sox want Ramirez back! I’m dead serious!
- The Bucs go to 9-3, then Monte Kiffin says he’ll leave at the end of the year with son Lane to the U. of Tennessee, and then they lose four straight and are out of the playoffs. The ST. PETERSBURG TIMES talks with Kiffin who admits it may not have been the right thing to announce his resignation when he did.
- IN GAME NOW says Derek Jeter is looking for a house in Los Angeles. Expect the Yankees to offer the Dodgers a 10-year, $453 million contract.
- The AP is reporting Clippers basketballperson Ricky Davis will be suspended five games for violating the league’s drug policy. Easy on the Sudafed, bro.
- The Mets have made some good acquisitions this offseason. They’re due for a rumor about an Andruw Jones-type tra… hey, lookit that!
- A fun find by SEATTLE WEEKLY regarding just how much Pat Riley thinks about the case sensitivity of his text messages to Dwyane Wade.
- You know how people older than you constantly remind you how tough they had it? Well, Oregon football back in the day had to endure private jets and lobster dinners, and Willie Glasper will be the last OU player who can claim that. Expect 2025’s Ducks team to bitch about the 15 miles of snow they had to play through.
- NEWSDAY says the Jets will be coached either by Bill Cowher or by Marty Schottenheimer, depending on whose prediction you believe. Using the quadratic formula, this means Rod Marinelli will be rumored to be the next Browns coach.
- And finally, Bernie Williams was quietly trying to make a career comeback for the World Baseball Classic, and his comeback could end on as quiet a whimper as it began, now that LOHUD YANKEES BLOG says he’s got a serious quad injury while playing winter ball in Puerto Rico. Carumba.