Speed Read: Cutler Crappy As Packers Stuff Bears

It’s been a while since the Bears have had a good quarterback. And it’s a shame, considering they’ve had some pretty good teams that were ultimately sabotaged by guys like Jim Miller and Rex Grossman. So we all know what a huge relief it was for the people of Chicago that they finally would have a real, legitimate star under center.

Jay Cutler

So, anyone missing Orton yet? In what is always a monumental game for the Bears, Jay Cutler was Brian Griese-esque as he threw four interceptions in a 21-15 loss to Green Bay at Lambeau Field. The CHICAGO TRIBUNE’s David Haugh says that Cutler wasn’t exactly keeping a cool head while everything crumbled around him:

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Week In Review: So Long, Simona Halep’s Hooters

• Romanian teen tennis player Simona Halep goes through on her threat to get a breast reduction. We’ll never look at her the same way again.

Simona Halep's First Photo After Breast Reduction Surgery

• Chiefs RB Larry Johnson spends his offseason in Las Vegas, where he’s buying large champagne bottles for some thirsty ladies.

• The Ultimate Warrior shares his thoughts on the late Michael Jackson.

• Green Bay Packers QB Aaron Rodgers grabs himself a girlfriend in gorgeous grapefruit heiress Julie Henderson.

• Italian swimmer Flavia Zoccari feels more cheeky than usual, as her swimsuit splits at the seat during a meet.

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GB QB Going Out w/Gorgeous Grapefruit Heiress

• Meet Julie Henderson, SI swimsuit model & grapefruit heiress - oh, and the main squeeze of Green Bay Packers QB Aaron Rodgers.

Julie Henderson

• Raider Nation celebrates 50 years of existence, spiked shoulder pads.

• The Miami Dolphins keep having identity issues. First it was Vontae Davis’ false arrest, and now it’s Davone Bess bothered by a fake Twitterer.

Tony Hawk takes a quick skateboard trip through the White House, and FOX NEWS throws a fit.

• Nothing says “I Love You” quite like personalized bobbleheads - just ask Red Sox owner John Henry & his new wife.

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Melons? Aaron Rodgers Much Prefers Grapefruits

Good morning. There’s nothing more refreshing in the morning than a nice big glass of grapefruit juice. But since I don’t have any handy, how about a smoking hot grapefruit heiress? Too bad Aaron Rodgers has that market covered.

Julie Henderson

The Packers quarterback needs to make some offseason headlines if he hopes to garner as much ink as his “retired” predecessor. Well, he’s off to a great start, seen “cozying up” (that’s NEW YORK POST speak for “seen with”) with SI Swimsuit Model Julie Henderson. While Green Bay’s not about to ignore Brett, this should help them forget all about Deanna Favre.

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Speed Read: Jim Leavitt Has Totally Lost His Mind

Being a college football coach is a high-pressure business - maybe not being an air traffic controller or a heart surgeon, where if you screw up people die, but it can be pretty intense. And if your team is getting a nasty reputation for late-season collapses, it might start getting to you after awhile. Witness South Florida coach Jim Leavitt: THE WIZ OF ODDS has video of him losing his mind during a press conference:

This is exactly how my cousin Aldo used to act, right before he took to chasing after the ice cream truck with his pants off and trying to recruit local children to “help repel the Huns.” Despite the lack of blustery, screaming theatrics, I’d still like to suggest that Leavitt ask his doctor if Paxil is right for him.

If ever there was an appropriate way to recap a ridiculously high-scoring (i.e. actually fun to watch) Week 12 in the NFL, the Saints’ 51-29 thrashing of the Packers was it. New Orleans became the 12th team to score 30 or more points this week, more than during any other week this season.

Saints fan before game vs Packers

Drew Bress continued his assault on the NFL record books, throwing for 323 yards and four TDs, but the Saints’ MVP might have been Packers’ QB Aaron Rodgers, who had a very Brett Favre-like performance on Monday night, except this was the bad Favre of 2005-2006. Translation: Rodgers threw three interceptions and the Packers had no chance.

And finally, a word to the wise - if you are going to shoot someone flashing a random group of tailgaters before a Cowboys game, try not to do it from directly behind them. Then again, if the flasher in question looks like a 45-year-old high school softball coach, maybe it’s for the best:

Here are some other stories you might have missed last night as you, like the rest of the US, were an emotional wreck after hearing about the Hannity and Colmes divorce:

  • Not even Tiger Woods is recession-proof: BLOOMBERG says that GM is pulling out of its endorsement deal at the end of the year, meaning that he’ll get to quit pretending that he really loves driving a Buick.
  • Tiger Woods and GM

  • Retired NHL goon Claude Lemieux is attempting a comeback, as the CANADIAN POST reports that the 43-year-old has signed a tryout contract with the San Jose Sharks. He’ll be heading to the AHL first to work on his baiting and sucker punching.
  • RIVALS.COM has a depressing look at Northwestern, the worst basketball program of the major conferences and the only which which has never been to the NCAA tournament. But at least their football team has a rich history of…ugh, never mind.
  • Your usual video of a student’s first trip to the Montana/Montana State rivalry, including drinking, push-ups…and a pretty solid catfight at about 1:05 in. (The problem with catfights in Montana in November: too much clothing to rip off.):
  • Despite this week’s performance, THE GRAND NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS would like to see all the Brett Favre vs. Aaron Rodgers comparisons stop, thanks.
  • The Clippers/Knicks trade is in limbo because of questions about Cuttino Mobley’s heart, says David Aldridge on NBA.COM. Literally - the Knicks have concerns about a possible pre-existing heart condition.
  • Mike Shanahan tells the AP that he’s OK with players taking out idiot fans who run out onto the field during games. How does he expect his team to tackle rowdy fans if they can’t even stop the Raiders?
  • Bob Arum confirms to ESPN.COM that the fight between Antonio Margarito and Shane Mosley is back on for Jan. 24 in Las Vegas, as boxing continues to respond to rumors of its demise by putting out decent fight cards.
  • Eric Thomas, who helped lead Kent State to the Elite Eight back in 2002, has been sentenced to eight years in prison for burglary and assault. The DAILY KENT STATER says that’s enough to get a banner with his accomplishments pulled off the rafters, but not enough for his number to be unretired.
  • Roger Goodell tells BROADCASTING & CABLE that despite the BCS package going to ESPN, we shouldn’t expect NFL playoff games on cable anytime soon. Also of note: the BCS considered a package that would have put all the BCS games on FX, which is just weird.

When you think “historically inept sports teams” you think about…

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Brett Favre’s Wife Demands Even More Respect

In the annals of mainstream sports media, there is probably no more celebrated figure, especially in the face of on-field performance, than Brett Favre. Sure, he’s an automatic Hall of Famer and holds a boatload of career records that’ll stand for many years, but he’s only got one All-Pro nomination in the last five years, and his Super Bowl ring is well past a decade old. Moreover, his annual “do I come back or not?” ritual hamstrung the Packers’ front office and certainly made Aaron Rodgers‘ life uncomfortable for years before the Packers finally called bullpackers last fall.

Brett Favre
(Brett Favre responds to criticism. Oh, we kid, we kid.)

And yet all the same, Favre’s constantly lauded by talking heads and lazy columnists; the announcers at today’s Chiefs-Jets game referred to him as “immortal” and “Sir Brett” without a hint of irony, and Peter King’s infatuation is well-documented. It’s enough to make an ordinary football fan throw up.

But Deanna Favre is no ordinary football fan, and she has had enough. Read more…

Rascal Flatts Make Aaron Rodgers’ Feet Happy

What’s worse, Aaron Rodgers being spotted at a Rascal Flatts concert, or Aaron Rodgers being spotted at a Rascal Flatts concert dancing on stage? Drew Olson of ON MILWAUKEE and ESPN Radio Milwaukee has some video of Rodgers doing just that last Thursday in Green Bay.

Aaron Rodgers Dances With Rascal Flatts

Those other fat guys on stage? Some are Packers. And some are member of the band (no truth to rumor that the tour is sponsored by Bojangles).

Video after the jump. Read more…

Fans Felt Burned By Brett Set Favre Stuff On Fire

I’ll admit to being a little taken aback when Brett Favre announced his un-retirement last month. Not so much because the future Hall of Fame quarterback had doubts about spending his remaining years at various Mississippi-area fishin’ holes — pretty much everybody figured he’d be back — but at the seemingly unanimous support he received from Green Bay Packers fans once he decided to resume his career.

Packers fans love Brett Favre

The organization, however, didn’t share in the excitement. In fact, they had moved on, fourth-year quarterback Aaron Rodgers was the team’s quarterback for 2008 and beyond, and with training camp just days away, the front office’s biggest dilemma was dealing with the public relations nightmare Favre had created.

While the club worked to trade Favre, Rodgers had to deal with taunts from Favre-loving fans (stay classy, children of Green Bay!), but the worst was aimed at Packers management.

But one Waukesha County family is taking a stand against conformity and poor judgment, and had themselves a little Favre-B-Q.

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Blog Jam: Did China Have To Cheat To Compete?

Spooky Mulder

Aaron Rodgers Decides To Send His Agent Packing

Now that Brett Favre is finally out of his hair, Aaron Rodgers can rightly take his place as field general for the Green Bay Packers. And now that he’s finally the man, Aaron has done what any star player would do - fire his agent to get something better.

Aaron Rodgers Packers pulled jersey

Liz Mullen of SPORTS BUSINESS DAILY reports that Mike Sullivan was given a termination letter from his quarterbacking client on Thursday. On Friday, Sullivan, who’s been Aaron’s agent since the Cal QB was drafted in 2005, confirmed that his services were no longer required by Rodgers:

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