TACOBY BELLSBURY URGES AMERICA TO STAGGER FLUSHES: Today is the day that wastewater treatment facilities go to Defcon 1 as Taco Bell gives out free tacos for its World Series promotion. The marketing idea was sheer genius, as the dirt burrito factory announced before the Series that it would give away one free taco to any and all if there was a single stolen base in the World Series (ya think?).

Boston’s Jacob Ellsbury swiped a bag in Game Two, guaranteeing the transactions between 2 and 5pm ET today and that the sale of Gas-X will skyrocket beginning at 5:01.

The BOSTON HERALD reports the giveaways will cost Taco Bell $700K, but of course they’ll make triple that because the vast majority of drones who participate will go for additional intestine-flushing items on the menu.

BLOG CRITICS notes how far marketing has gone, with video of Red Sox coach Royce Clayton talking to Ellsbury during Game Two of the Series, just before he stole away the hearts of the morbidly obese.

And Clayton also discussing the deal with Red Sox outfielder Coco Crisp later in the game.

Then there’s something called DonateYourTaco.com, which (we think) involves donating your taco to the website, which will then try to cash in the value of that donation with a charitable contribution from Taco Bell. Right, that’s almost as legit as Mike Shannon laying off the sauce past 11am CDT.Finally, YARDBARKER has something we can’t believe Taco Bell didn’t think of: