Guess what, kids? Only five more days until the Super Bowl, which can only mean one thing: five more days of nonsense stories to fill page inches (assuming newspapers still exist in your town) that had been reserved for more popular teams and compelling characters.
That’s why the ASSOCIATED PRESS wants you to know Tampa has lots of strip clubs. Compelling baby-got-backstory!
(Tomorrow: Did you know there are 14 Taco Bells in Tampa, many open all night? Reminds us of that In-N-Out Burger in Peoria, AZ…)
You can find out the high scores for the Mons Venus from patrons and how it’s within walking distance of Raymond James Stadium. Also, clubs will stay open around the clock and cops will likely not enforce local ordinances (shall we say, Gold Club-style ordinances) strictly due to the influx of athletes and corporate executives and the like.
It’s a fine sordid tale… just like when the AP published the same damned story in 2001 for Tampa’s most recent Super Bowl hosting duties.
We understand there were 13-year-olds that weren’t allowed to read the filthy sports section full of strippers and cocaine in 2001 that now would be legal and respectful patrons of Tampa’s finest adult establishments and find this useful information.
For the rest of us, it just means we’d really like it to be Sunday now because there apparently aren’t 50 words left to string together in a unique manner about this game.