We’re all well aware of the financial difficulties facing may college athletic programs. Schools are constantly looking for ways to help trim budgets, whether it’s halting the practice of hosting football players in hotel rooms before home games, or convincing basketball coaches to turn down raises so their team can afford trips to Australia.
Stanford is one such school not immune to budgetary shortfalls. 20 Cardinal athletics employees have already lost their jobs, and some of the less revenue-generating sports could be headed for the chopping block. So it seems like just as good a time as any to build football coach Jim Harbaugh a $70,000 private bathroom.
Jon Wilner of the SAN JOSE MERCURY NEWS reports that Stanford billionaire booster John Arrillaga built a new bathroom & shower for Harbaugh inside the Cardinal’s athletics offices, and the new coach-cleansing facilities reportedly cost between $50,000 & $70,000.
Was such a pricey porcelain-based project really necessary? Of course!
Until now, the nearest bathroom was about 20 steps down the hall from the football office. The nearest shower was two floors below Harbaugh’s desk.
Oh, the indignity of it all! No wonder Stanford football has struggled all these years - how can a coach properly prepare his team for battle when he has to take two flights of stairs to loofah up?
Luckily, Harbaugh no longer has to put up with such hardships. And Jim sounds pleased with John’s handiwork, saying the donor did a nice job, while adding, “It was something I’d asked for. It cuts down on drag.’’
I, for one, really don’t care to know what kind of drag Jim is doing in the bathroom. But now that he has his own private place to do his business, we don’t have to worry about it anymore.
So, sorry, Stanford fencing team, we’ll have to dump your sport - but at least Harbaugh’s dumps won’t have to take as long now.