Kyle Orton Makes Jay Cutler Look Like John Elway

Hey, Broncos fans. Remember back when Jay Cutler was an unhappy Bronco, trying to force a trade out of town? Remember that, and how most fans and media in the Denver area acted like a bunch of jilted high school boyfriends when he asked for a trade? Oh, yes, Denver fans. You claimed you never liked the guy anyway, and he was a big baby jerkface, and you’d be better off without such a non-team player. Yeah, those days were fun, right? Right up to the point when you wound up with Kyle Orton. Oops.

Kyle Orton Broncos

Fast forward a few months. Cutler is turning heads all around Chicago with his brash style, confident demeanor, and football abilities. He’s the talk of the town today after blowing the Giants out of the water in yesterday’s preseason game, and has Bears fans excited about contending for a division championship and maybe even more. Denver, meanwhile, is being treated to…well, Kyle Orton, who does Kyle Orton things in his own Kyle Orton way.

(Warning: Video after the jump is not for the weak of stomach - for Broncos fans, anyway.)

Donkey fans were already nervous about the bedrunked one, and last week’s first preseason game didn’t help matters when Orton tossed three picks in limited action. Then, last night, he made a play that I wouldn’t have even made playing JV high school football (pssst…fast forward to, like, the last 10 seconds or so):

Note to Kyle: You are not Peyton Manning. You are not John Elway. Your arm is as weak as your chin. Do not throw left-handed. As a Bears fan who had to put up with the exercise in mediocrity that was the Kyle Orton Era, I can sadly say to Broncos fans that this is just the beginning. Get the Coors handy; it’s going to be a long season.