Now that Madonna and Guy Ritchie have decided to get divorced, she and also-newly-single Alex Rodriguez are finally free to go public with their creepy (alleged) love affair. It’s kinda like the Joe DiMaggio-Marilyn Monroe romance, just more cougar-y and a lot less clutch.

FOX NEWS reports that A-Rod has been secretly subletting an apartment in New York’s Time Warner Center for some time now, and that Madge has been a frequent guest to the building. Now A-Rod is supposedly diving head-first into the whole Kabbalah thing, and the religion stands to get about $27.5 million of Steinbrenner’s money, if you believe Jerry Hall.

Fox’s Roger Friedman quotes Hall, Mick Jagger’s ex-wife, as saying that Kabbalah is an expensive hobby:

“They always talked about giving in order to receive, but I didn’t really realize that in order to go through a door of miracles you had to give ten per cent of your income.”

All signs are pointing toward a spiritual conversion for A-Rod, who I suppose needs some way to deal with being booed on a daily basis:

Rodriguez is said to have attended the group’s version of “Yom Kippur” services at New York’s Kabbalah Center with Madonna last week. Easily impressed, Rodriguez could next start pitching for Kabbalah’s Raising Malawi charity. After all, he - and not Ritchie - attended the Kabbalah-Malawi fundraiser sponsored by Gucci and UNICEF last February.

The concept of tithing is nothing new in regard to religion, but Kabbalah, like Scientology, is bringing in the big bucks due to its appeal to wealthy individuals. At a 10% clip, A-Rod would be donating $2.75 million a year to Philip Berg’s Kabbalah Centre coffers. I’m sure Hank Steinbrenner is thrilled to be giving to such a worthy cause.

The best part of all of this is the possibility that Rodriguez may start getting really hilarious in postgame interviews. “I think the evil spirits made me hit into that 6-4-3. I just need to cleanse my soul tonight.” He might even contend that his career home-run total should be added to the number that his reincarnation will hit in the 2080’s.

Will he start sitting out games on Yom Kippur? Is he going to be sporting those ridiculous bracelets on the field next year? This is all going to end very well, considering the “love” Yankee fans have for him already.