On Tuesday morning Craig Coakley woke up and went to work with a smile on his face. That’s because he knew that Tuesday was going to be the last time he woke up as a nobody, for he was going to make his mark on the world that night. Then his moment arrived when he stripped off his clothes, tied a toy monkey around his waist, and became the first streaker in the history of Citi Field.
It was an epic, magical moment that all of those in attendance with share with family and friends for years to come.
For Coakley I’m sure his life as a plumber is over, and now a new world of celebrity and power surely awaits him. That or possibly a year in jail and definitely a fine, but that’s cool too. A year in jail is nothing compared to the eight years Coakley spent planning his moment in the spotlight.
From the NEW YORK DAILY NEWS:
“It was a once-in-a-lifetime experience,” said Coakley, 29, of Whitestone, Queens. “Let’s go, Mets!”
Coakley declined to discuss his Tuesday night slide into second base.
His sister said Coakley had planned the fifth-inning foray for eight years. His boss at a Floral Park plumbing company said the streaker proclaimed his plans before leaving work.
“He said, ‘I’m probably not going to be in tomorrow,’” recalled John Musella of Tri-County Plumbing. “And I said, ‘You’re out of your mind.’”
Seriously, it took him eight years to plan this? How long do you have to work on a plan to take off your clothes and tie a monkey around your waist? Was it going to be a teddy bear for the first five years of the plan, but then suddenly in June of 2006 he had an epiphany that it had to be a monkey? Was he going to Mets games and studying the moving patterns of all the security personnel in the stadium?
What the hell was all this planning?
As for Coakley’s punishment, he faces up to a year in prison and about $5,000 in fines. He’s also been banned from Citi Field, so he’ll have to plan any future streaking endeavors from the couch at home.