Billy Byler of the AUGUSTA CHRONICLE has what seems like a harmless press release about the formation of a basketball minor league:
(Literalists, go no further.)
The All-American Basketball Alliance announced in a news release Sunday evening that it intends to start its inaugural season in June and hopes Augusta will be one of 12 cities with a team.
Thankfully Byler, and Rick Chandler, kept reading.
“Only players that are natural born United States citizens with both parents of Caucasian race are eligible to play in the league.”
Brilliant! So who’s the bigot mastermind behind this bright idea?
Don “Moose” Lewis, the commissioner of the AABA, said the reasoning behind the league’s roster restrictions is not racism.
“There’s nothing hatred about what we’re doing,” he said. “I don’t hate anyone of color. But people of white, American-born citizens are in the minority now. Here’s a league for white players to play fundamental basketball, which they like.”
“Would you want to go to the game and worry about a player flipping you off or attacking you in the stands or grabbing their crotch?” he said. “That’s the culture today, and in a free country we should have the right to move ourselves in a better direction.”
“People will come out and support a product they can identify with. I’m the spoken minority right now, but if people will give us a chance, it’ll work… The white game of basketball, which is essentially a fundamental game, works.”
My goodness, how unthinking and insensitive can one man be?
Never thought I’d see the day that jews and homosexuals wouldn’t be excluded in such a noble endeavor. Gypsies too! (Guessing they’ll be the boiled peanut vendors.)
Lewis also said that in order for a franchise to succeed, “We need a local person ingrained into the community to make this successful.”
If Lewis is able to locate such upstanding citizens in 12 southern cities, I’m sure local law enforcement would be much appreciated.
As it’s such a deserving cause, I thought’d I’d give Mr. Lewis a recommendation for Atlanta’s power forward:
No brainer, so long as Mr. Lewis thinks she’s light-skinned enough to use the water fountain.
10:34 pm on January 19th, 2010
I think the first draft pick should be Mr Edward Norton,
He did a great job as point guard in the movie American History X.
10:39 pm on January 19th, 2010
I agree, here is your star player
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbLIw4DBzHo
10:58 pm on January 19th, 2010
its kinda like reverse racism. and there’s lots of fundamental baskets ball leagues at your local YMCA/gym. so all the avg white guys can still get there game on.
11:03 pm on January 19th, 2010
Isn’t this the same as Patriot League basketball? Actually it’s the opposite, all those players are going to have college degrees.
12:11 am on January 20th, 2010
Can they just promote (or demote) the BYU squad to this league?
3:38 am on January 20th, 2010
democrat senator harry reid will be the commissioner….he of the “light skinned” blacks and”negro dialect” appreciation comments yes he said negro someone call the rick chandler post police… oh wait chandler is busy ignoring that story
4:17 am on January 20th, 2010
I can’t wait for the all-black hockey league, the all-white track & field federation, the all-black swim meet ,etc. etc. etc.
4:18 am on January 20th, 2010
All-Asian NASCAR …
Okay, I’m done.
7:13 am on January 20th, 2010
Hypocrite Brooks, where is your Mike Greenburg MLK take…..
9:46 am on January 20th, 2010
@Truth - a 1 lap race, or points based on pile-ups per lap?
11:59 am on January 20th, 2010
Can’t wait for the ‘lay-up’ competition at the all star game
12:05 pm on January 20th, 2010
Hey cokane you said…
its kinda like reverse racism.
Really? I thought racism was just racism?
reversed racism means NO racism…go to school you idiot.
6:57 pm on January 20th, 2010
They should have black owners… a black commissioner… most of the GMs should be black… &, of course, rules that make it necessary to act in ways that black people find agreeable… the players should go out of their way to be as “white” as possible… there should be fines & suspensions…
And there should be a sports network devoted to covering the league in a sensationalized manner… maybe BET could air the games
7:02 pm on January 20th, 2010
can’t wait for that AABA Live 2k11 to come out…
2:36 am on January 21st, 2010
they shud then just hang the whole league on a cross
9:59 am on January 21st, 2010
The Kaucasian Konfederate Konference